Neighborly invasion

I don't really know my neighbors that well. The ones I have a super cute gay couple, a large grumpy/nice sometimes smoking couple and the noisy ones upstairs. In my dream someone tried to get into our home and you could tell it was a drunk neighbor because they were using keys. So finally, I got up to tell them they have the wrong door. They need to go to their house. This angers them. They then try to break in by banging their bodies and a brook showed up at one point. I started to panic and had my sister dial the police than she hands to the phone to me, I was busy trying to hold the door shut. I tried to explain the police what was happening and I was so nervous because if I report this it will be so awkward to live next to them from now on...

I'm pretty sure this happened because before I fell asleep I swear I heard someone knock on our door, at like 1am. SO I WAS NOT ABOUT TO ANSWER IT.

Buckle your seatbelt for this one

Ok, there is absolutely no connection between these "scenes". But my roommate/sister did wake me up at 7am this morning talking too loud on her phone and asking for some socks. SO maybe when I fell back asleep thats when the dreams disjointed, I'm not too sure.

Here we go...(all arms and feet in at all times)

The first one I remember was sitting at my grandmother's table and my two sisters and my brother were doing shots in memory of my youngest aunt, Vicky, getting divorced years ago. The date on the cake said January something, I wonder if thats anywhere close to the date. These shots weren't just regular pour and drink shots, one was in the form of cake, one was a thick syrup and the other was like 8 oz. And they were all apparently hard to swallow, they all made terrible faces afterward. Then I got to eat the last of the celebration cake with the date on it. (That's how I remember the cake. Oh and I ended up wearing a Beyonce like metal gladiator mini dress and THIS my grandmother didn't approve, so she made me wear one of her old lady dresses. Fin.

This dream seamed to have the same local as the previous but it was pouring outside and there was a collection of birds in my grandma's kitchen. One bird in particular that scared me. I tried to draw it to show how effed up my mind can be, But to describe, it was large, about the size of a small cat or possum. It had a large beak with the tip of the beak elongating into a sharp curled point. It had Large, unproportionately large tallons. They looked like they belonged to a eagle, like thick and sharp. Then this is where it gets weird, as if it hasn't already, the midsection of the bird was filled with tiny little legs like thie underbelly of a rolly polly or a patoto bug. Which made sense because with this bird you could roll it up like a rolly polly. Which someone did, my real life boss. Which totally makes sense, I just had an epiphany, because just a few days ago at work we found one and i didn't want to touch it so he picked up and made it roll up. ANy who, these birds including the scary one, kept getting out of the cage and were attracted to movement. So I kept staying still hoping they'd ignore me but every once in a while I'd get scared and make a sudden movement and they'd come for me!

Scurry.

Fin.

Next dream was Bill Ray Cyrus lived across the stret from Michael Jordan's dad and was always trying to impress him, and Mr. Jordan knew it. So one day, as a joke I think, invited Bill Ray over for an eating competition. If he could complete it he could have like 2 minutes of his time. Item to be ingested were: paper, ice cream, girls' scout cookies, and brownies. It was a massive amount of food and he had to eat it all in 10 minutes. But he did. He won. Did I mention he had to eat paper? That seemed to be the most time challenging.

Fin.

A guest entry

Here is a dream my friend Kathleen M., member of All The Apparatus, had about me:

"Kim, I had this weird dream with you in it. You worked for your mom's salon and dressed in a sweatshirt and booty shorts and you wanted me to dye my hair.


The funny part is that it was supposed to be a real high class salon and you were the receptionist, and dressed that way."

Bad Omen

I had a dream my car was hit but the insurance company wouldn't pay for it because I am liability only. I am looking at insurances now...